GOTCHA AGAIN

So the next evening I get over there. She cooked chicken, rice and spinach and I, like the food pig that I am, eat every last bit of this. I wish I could front and say that she cooked but that would be a lie. Did I mention that I was eating this dinner with her son that I just met? Insert uncomfortable moment here.

After dinner I am playing video games with her son and we tolerating each other, i.e. he is not shooting glances at me and what nefarious activities I have in store for his mother. God forbid I get caught like Philly Live with him bursting into her bedroom while she is riding me like a crowd favorite in the Kentucky Derby.

His bedtime is fast approaching and I am gearing up for another round of word play with Kryptonite. She sends him to his room and gets cozy with me. I couldn't tell you how this came about but she tells me " You know I have breast implants". My reply " No you don't, I know breast implants and you don't have them" . She then asks how do I know for certain. " Well I have I have had extensive educational training from Sue's Rendezvous, conveniently located at 96 Gramatan Avenue Mount Vernon NY 10550 and besides when you lay on your back they flatten out nicely". She then says that I am deifnitely wrong and I tell her prove it. She lowers her shirt and says " See? Here is a scar from the operation".......Grrrrrrrrr I'm like" The lighting in this place is atrocious I can't see a thing". GOTCHA. She then grabs my hand and puts on her breast to feel for the implant. GOTCHA. Guess what? I did feel an implant, go figure, I guess I am more of a hands on type person. Anyway after checking for lumps in the breast exam it appears the only one I found was in my crotch. So I made a mental note to go to the doctor to get that checked out but it finally went away after a quick trip to the bathroom, i read the cure in a home remedy book.

So we continue talking or better yet she talks and I just nod my head say " yeah...uh huh....right...that's funny...that bitch sounds crazy". Yes I am looking to get underneath that bra and at those " tig o' bitties". But I refrain...why? because I actually may like this one and I am trying to figure her out to see where this goes.

So do I continue to talk about this one in a blog if I am really feeling her? Ofcourse, for now, the names have been changed to protect the innocent.